Matt Melvin

"While all the jocks in the world are glued to their TVs, I’m looking at pictures of naked women on the internet. WHO’S THE FAGGOT NOW?"
— @MattMelvin

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"You know those slides that make Play-doh come out in different shapes? Hold them up to your butt while pooping! #fun #fresh #family"
— @MattMelvin

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NEW COMIC: Feminism! …Sort of

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Found an old chatlog of Rob, Kris and I discussing buying a fridge for the office

Rob: i found a mini fridge for $350 at home depot, is it cool with you guys if i get it
Rob: heh... "cool" with you guys
Kris: you can get one at wal mart for 40
Rob: really?
Kris: but if this one is sweet i'm down
Rob: that seems impossibly cheap
Kris: i thought so too
Matt: $350 is running around the price of normal fridges
Matt: mini fridges dont cost that much, do they?
Rob: it's mini bordering on full size
Rob: i'll check walmart's selection first
Kris: maybe it's a mini-big fridge
Rob: littlebigfridge
Kris: as long as the fridge acts like it's worth 350
Rob: it's the sort of fridge that dresses up nice on a saturday night but still jokes around with the guys
Matt: im worried about kids playing hide and seek in it
Matt: is it small enough to fit a kid?
Kris: more importantly, will it keep them fresh?
Matt: i dont care about freshness really
Matt: i just want it to kill kids
Kris: you don't want a spoiled rotten id
Kris: kid*
Matt: a rotten id is pretty scary, too
Rob: the fridge can fit the entire staff of Id Software
Kris: get it
Rob: they're working on Doom 4 inside of it as we speak
Matt: doom? so it cant keep it's contents fresh, i guess
Kris: zing!
Rob: that last minute or so of silence was me trying to figure out video game / fridge jokes
Rob: but i couldnt think of any
Rob: sorry you guys